It's ok to sleep at night...

Dear Little Ru,

Your mother and I wanted to make sure you understood a few things. First, it's ok to sleep at night. The bags under your mother's eyes may look funny and it makes you smile, but it makes your mom sad. Also, I have to stay up with you on the weekends and, although I enjoy our time together, it makes me realize what your mom is going through most nights.

Here are some sleeping tips that I've picked up through the years. Feel free to try any and/or all of these, multiple times if necessary...until one of them works. Please.

I like to think about things I need to do, you know, like chores. That usually makes me sleepy. Also, when you're able to eat real food, turkey makes me want to sleep...that, and copious amounts of mashed potatoes and gravy...and by "copious amounts" I mean the whole thing...and by "mashed potatoes" I mean Apple pie.

Count sheep - I know you can't count yet, but I have tried this and it does work...no matter how many mountain dews I have consumed.

Watching your mom's favorite TV shows puts me to sleep almost instantly. In fact, even now when you're cranky and Real Housewives of Beverly Hills comes on, you fall asleep within seconds. You don't even wait for the show to start, you hear the theme music and you're out. It's actually impressive, and I'm not easily impressed.

Homework - this put me to sleep when I was in college, but, may have had less to do with me studying and more to do with what I was doing until 4 AM the night before.

Work - similar to homework, where you are working at home - work is where you work at work...it gets complicated. No one explained to me when I was a kid how I could be tired all day at work and then at the end of the day after working all day I would get a bunch of energy. It's called "looking forward to seeing your wife and son". (See also Monday Night Football)

Well, that should at least get you started. When all else fails you can just shut your eyes for an extended period of time. Eventually you'll get the hang of it.

I know your mom would appreciate it.

I love you more than a cream puff on an escalator (cream puffs also help you get to sleep).

Love,

Dad

So You're Gonna Be A Son

Dear Little Baby Baum,

In a few short days you're gonna be a son. Your life is going to change. Before Thursday, October 6th, 2011 it was just you. All you had to worry about was taking nutrients from the cord and floating around in the placenta. Life was a breeze before. Reality starts on Thursday for you, my friend. No more hiding out in the dark safety of your mom's uterus. It's go-time now. Instead of being crouched in the fetal position, you'll be crouched in every conceivable position, as your mom and dad and grandparents and great-grandparents, and uncles and aunts and cousins take photos of you non-stop...day and night...awake and asleep.

You'll think, "I remember when it was just me, alone with my thoughts and my delicious thumb." Those days are gone. Now you have to put up with a goofy father who loves watching football and dressing you up in green and yellow and, occasionally, Duke Blue Devil Blue. It will be the hardest thing, and the most rewarding thing you'll have gone through so far.

Yes, Russell. Your life is going to change.

Of course your parent's life will change too...but yours...your change will be exponentially greater.

So you thought nutrients from the umbilical cord were good. Well, I have news for you...wait til you're old enough to taste Doritos. I can't even begin to imagine how comfortable it must feel inside the womb...but wait until you're old enough to lay on a memory foam mattress. You like to suck your thumb, who doesn't! But wait 'til you start playing basketball! You are in for a great life, Russell. Your mom and I will make sure of that.

Just don't let it go to your head. You're going to be told non-stop how cute you are, and how smart you are, and how awesome you are. I'll tell you that you're my best little buddy. You're mom will call you her little man. Maggie will get jealous of all the attention you are getting and possibly start to growl at you. Take it all in stride. Know that there may be two or three other babies out there that are just as cute if not cuter. There may be a smarter kid out there, maybe not in the western hemisphere, but probably somewhere in the world there will be. There may be a set of parents that love their son as much as your mom and I do already. Probably not, but maybe.

Can't wait until we get to hang out.

I am obsessed with you already. So is your mom.

I promise to be the best dad to you that I can be. You're going to think I'm perfect for the first few years of your life and maybe into your teens, but someday you'll see that I'm just a man. You'll see my faults. You'll see my weaknesses and mistakes. You'll understand that I'm not perfect, but you'll see through Christ that I am. You'll know that when I say "I Love You, Russell", that I meant it. Every time. You'll become your own person, with your own independent thoughts and dreams. You'll see us there for you when you triumph...you'll feel how it feels to fail and still be loved.

You will always be loved. You will always be my son.

See you on Thursday.

Love,

Dad.